Free Will Astrology : All Horoscopes


	Horoscopes for week of April 21, 2016 "The writer should never be ashamed of staring," said Aries writer Flannery O'Connor. "There is nothing that does not require his attention." This is also true for all of you Aries folks, not just the writers among you. And the coming weeks will be an especially important time for you to cultivate a piercing gaze that sees deeply and shrewdly. You will thrive to the degree that you notice details you might normally miss or regard as unimportant. What you believe and what you think won't be as important as what you perceive. Trust your eyes. * "Whether I shall turn out to be the hero of my own life, or whether that station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show." So begins Charles Dickens' novel David Copperfield. I'd like to inspire you to write a story of your own that begins like that. For help, tune into your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. * SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. * All I ask of you: Be my slow-motion dance. Be my birthday earthquake. Be my spiral marble staircase in the middle of a Vermont meadow. Be my handstand on a barstool, my whirlwind week in clown school, my joke shared with a Siberian shaman while shopping for T-shirts at Sears. Be my last because . . . . Hear or read the rest of this meditation.
	The ancient Greek geographer Pausanias told a story about how the famous poet Pindar got his start. One summer day, young Pindar decided to walk from his home in Thebes to a city 20 miles away. During his trek, he got tired and lay down to take a nap by the side of the road. As he slept, bees swarmed around him and coated his lips with wax. He didn't wake up until one of the bees stung him. For anyone else, this might have been a bother. But Pindar took it as an omen that he should become a lyric poet, a composer of honeyed verses. And that's exactly what he did in the ensuing years. I foresee you having an experience comparable to Pindar's sometime soon, Taurus. How you interpret it will be crucial. * I invite you to keep a running list of all the ways life delights you and helps you and energizes you. Describe everyday miracles you take for granted . . . the uncanny powers you possess . . . the small joys that occur so routinely you forget how much they mean to you . . . the steady flow of benefits bestowed on you by people you know and don't know. What works for you? What makes you feel at home in the world? For inspiration in this noble effort, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. * SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. * "The real secret of magic is that the world is made of words," said Terence McKenna, "and that if you know the words that the world is made of, you can make of it whatever you wish." Here's my version of that hypothesis: What world you end up living in depends at least in part on your use of language. Do you want to move and breathe amidst infertile chaos where nothing makes sense and no one really loves anyone? Then speak with unconscious carelessness, expressing yourself lazily. Constantly materialize and entertain angry thoughts in the privacy of your own imagination, beaming silent curses out into eternity. Or would you prefer to live in a realm that's rich with fluid epiphanies and intriguing coincidences and mysterious harmonies? Then be discerning and inventive in how you speak, primed to name the unexpected codes that are always being born right in front of your eyes. Turn your imagination into an ebullient laboratory where the somethings you create out of nothings are tinctured with the secret light you see in your dreams of invisible fire . . . . Hear or read the rest of this meditation.
	"I measure the strength of a spirit by how much truth it can take," said philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche. Measured by that standard, your strength of spirit has been growing -- and may be poised to reach an all-time high. In my estimation, you now have an unusually expansive capacity to hold surprising, effervescent, catalytic truths. Do you dare invite all these insights and revelations to come pouring toward you? I hope so. I'll be cheering you on, praying for you to be brave enough to ask for as much as you can possibly accommodate. * All of creation loves you very much. Even now, people you know and people you don't know are collaborating to make sure you have all you need to make your next smart move. But are you willing to start loving life back with an equal intensity? The adoration it offers you has not exactly been unrequited, but there is room for you to be more demonstrative. For help in cultivating this approach, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. * SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. * I want to be free in the mystery of love I want to be wild when the world begins again I want to wake up and listen Be in love with my life and death and I want you to be there with me I want all the children to have enough to eat I want all the angry men to destroy their own pain I want us all to be happy and crazy and safe and real I want everybody to be loved Hear this meditation.
	Gobekli Tepe was a monumental religious sanctuary built 11,600 years ago in the place we now call Turkey. Modern archaeologists are confounded by the skill and artistry with which its massive stone pillars were arranged and carved. According to conventional wisdom, humans of that era were primitive nomads who hunted animals and foraged for plants. So it's hard to understand how they could have constructed such an impressive structure 7,000 years before the Great Pyramid of Giza. Writing in National Geographic, science journalist Charles C. Mann said, "Discovering that hunter-gatherers had constructed G�bekli Tepe was like finding that someone had built a 747 in a basement with an X-Acto knife." In that spirit, Cancerian, I make the following prediction: In the coming months, you can accomplish a marvel that may have seemed beyond your capacity. * What are the obvious secrets you can't quite see? How could you turn your challenges into daily gifts for yourself? For clues to mysteries like these, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. * SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. * When an old tree in the rain forest dies and topples over, it takes a long time to decompose. As it does, it becomes host to new saplings that use the decaying log for nourishment. Picture yourself sitting in the forest gazing upon this scene. How would you describe it? Would you dwell on the putrefaction of the fallen tree while ignoring the fresh life sprouting out of it? If you did that, you�d be imitating the perspective of many modern storytellers, especially the journalists and novelists and filmmakers and producers of TV dramas. They devoutly believe that tales of affliction and mayhem and corruption and tragedy are inherently more interesting than tales of triumph and liberation and pleasure and ingenuity. The German actor Udo Kier summed up the general consensus in an interview he did a few years ago. "Evil has no limit," he sneered, blustering like a naughty genius. "Evil has no limit. Good has a limit. Good is not as interesting as evil." Two hundred years ago the poet John Keats said that if something is not beautiful, it is probably not true. But Udo Kier and his many compatriots disagree with Keats. With one voice, they imply that if something is not ugly, it is not true . . . . Hear or read the rest of this meditation.
	In myths and folklore, the ember is a symbol of coiled-up power. The fire within it is controlled. It provides warmth and glow even as its raw force is contained. There are no unruly flames. How much energy is stored within? It's a reservoir of untapped light, a promise of verve and radiance. Now please ruminate further about the ember, Leo. According to my reading of the astrological omens, it's your core motif right now. * Grace emerges in the ebb and flow, not just the flow. The waning reveals a different blessing than the waxing. Where are you in the great cycle of your life? For inspiration in figuring it all out, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. * SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. * You taste delicious Animals understand you Your importance is unusual The funny faces you make are interesting to look at You fight for power in all the right ways Ecstatic gratitude is pouring out of you I see the best in you Your divine attitude You have strong feet and a pioneer heart No one can overflow as well as you can You are famous with God You are famous with me You are famous with the snakes and birds and roses and pines and oceans and earth and sky A lost tribe salutes you from the other side of the veil You remind me of a star Hear this meditation.
	Uh-oh. Or maybe I should instead say "Hooray!" You are slipping into the Raw Hearty Vivid Untamed Phase of your astrological cycle. The universe is nudging you in the direction of high adventure, sweet intensity, and rigorous stimulation. If you choose to resist the nudges, odds are that you'll have more of an "uh-oh" experience. If you decide to play along, "hooray!" is the likely outcome. To help you get in the proper mood, make the following declaration: "I like to think that my bones are made from oak, my blood from a waterfall, and my heart from wild daisies." (That's a quote from the poet McKenzie Stauffer.) * Whether it's your time to ferment in the shadows or sing in the sun, fresh power to transform yourself is on the way. Life always delivers the creative energy you need to change into the new thing you must become. For more help in understanding it all, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. * SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. * Welcome to the Beauty and Truth Lab. We're coming to you live from your repressed memories of paradise, reminding you that you can have anything you want if you will just ask for it in an unselfish way. Welcome to the end of your nightmares, beauty and truth fans! The world is young, your soul is free, and a naked celebrity is dying to talk to you about your most intimate secrets right now. Just kidding. In fact, the world is young, your soul is free, and at any moment you will feel a flood of ecstatic compassion for salamanders, oak trees, clouds, toasters, convenience store clerks, and even the ocean itself. I'm your host. My name is the Sacred Janitor at the Edge of Time, and I'm proud to announce that this is a perfect moment. It's a perfect moment for many reasons, but especially because you are on the verge of finally figuring out exactly what it is you really want more than anything else . . . . Hear or read the rest of this meditation.
	In many cultures, the butterfly is a symbol of transformation and rebirth. In its original state as a caterpillar, it is homely and slow-moving. After its resurrection time in the chrysalis, it becomes a lithe and lovely creature capable of flight. The mythic meaning of the moth is quite different, however. Enchanted by the flame, it's driven so strongly toward the light that it risks burning its wings. So it's a symbol of intense longing that may go too far. In the coming weeks, Libra, your life could turn either way. You may even vacillate between being moth-like and butterfly-like. For best results, set an intention. What exactly do you want? * You can learn to be lucky. It's not a mystical force you're born with, but a habit you can develop. How? For starters, be open to new experiences, trust your gut wisdom, expect good fortune, see the bright side of challenging events, and master the art of maximizing serendipitous opportunities. For more help, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. * SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. * The poet Muriel Rukeyser said the universe is composed of stories, not of atoms. The physicist Werner Heisenberg declared that the universe is made of music, not of matter. And we believe that if you habitually expose yourself to toxic stories and music, you could wind up living in the wrong universe, where it's impossible to become the gorgeous genius you were born to be. That's why we implore you to nourish yourself with delicious, nutritious tales and tunes that inspire you to exercise your willpower for your highest good. Hear this meditation.
	"I gladly abandon dreary tasks, rational scruples, reactive undertakings imposed by the world," wrote Scorpio philosopher Roland Barthes. Why did he do this? For the sake of love, he said -- even though he knew it might cause him to act like a lunatic as it freed up tremendous energy. Would you consider pursuing a course like that in the coming weeks, Scorpio? In my astrological opinion, you have earned some time off from the grind. You need a break from the numbing procession of the usual daily rhythms. Is there any captivating person, animal, adventure, or idea that might so thoroughly incite your imagination that you'd be open to acting like a lunatic lover with boundless vigor? * Somewhere there's a treasure that has no value to anyone but you, and a secret that's meaningless to everyone except you, and a frontier that harbors a revelation only you would know how to exploit. Why not go in search of those things? For inspiration, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. * SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. * Your magic talisman is a thousand-year-old Joshua tree whose flowers blossom just one night each year and can only be pollinated by the yucca moth Your special time of the day is the moment just before the mist evaporates You have fire in your blood and sea salt in your tears Your vision of power is the red-tailed hawk soaring over the shopping mall The colors of your soul are ivory vermilion, sable, and jade Your soil of destiny is peat moss The legendary deed that most resembles the method in your madness is the story of the hero who tames the monster without touching it You have a secret name that will be revealed to you very soon Your sweet spot is between the true believers and the scoffing skeptics Your holiest pain comes from your ability to sense other people's cracked notions about you Your magic verbs are dig, descend, and disclose The garage sale item you most resemble is an old but beautiful and sonorous accordion with a broken key Your mythic symbol is a treasure chest dislodged from its hiding place in the earth by a flood Hear this meditation.
	"Difficulties illuminate existence," says novelist Tom Robbins, "but they must be fresh and of high quality." Your assignment, Sagittarius, is to go out in search of the freshest and highest-quality difficulties you can track down. You're slipping into a magical phase of your astrological cycle when you will have exceptional skill at rounding up useful dilemmas and exciting riddles. Please take full advantage! Welcome this rich opportunity to outgrow and escape boring old problems. * When they say "Be yourself," which self do they mean? Certainly not the self that wants to win every game and use up every resource and stand alone at the end of time on a mountain of pretty garbage. So which self is it? For guidance, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. * SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. * Many of us are essentially asleep, even as we walk around in broad daylight. We're so focused on the restless narratives and repetitive fantasies unfurling in our heads that we only dimly perceive the larger story raging in all of its chaotic beauty around us. To have any hope of permanently breaking out of our fuzzy trance, we require regular shocks. A single jolt might cause us to briefly come to attention and see the miracle of creation for what it is, but once the red alert has passed, we relax back into our fixation on the dreamy tales our mind never stops telling us. In the course of its conspiracy to shower us with blessings, life does its best to provide us with a steady flow of healing shocks. But because it tends to err on the side of tenderness, its prods may be too gentle, allowing us to ignore them. Gradually, life will up the ante, trying to find the right mix of toughness and love, as it encourages us to WAKE UP! But our addiction to the phantasmagoria is tenacious. The stream-of-conscious narratives and ever-bubbling fantasies, even when they're racked with torment and terror, are perversely entertaining. And so we may avoid responding to the kind shocks for so long that life finally has to resort to stronger medicine. Then we might get sick or lose our job or muck up our closest relationship. It doesn't have to be that way. We could cultivate in ourselves a sixth sense for the wake-up calls life sends us. We might develop a knack for responding with agile grace to the early, gentler ones so that we wouldn't have to be visited by the more stringent measures . . . . Hear or read the rest of this meditation.
	"When I grow up, I want to be a little boy," wrote novelist Joseph Heller in his book Something Happened. You have cosmic permission to make a comparable declaration in the coming days. In fact, you have a poetic license and a spiritual mandate to utter battle cries like that as often as the mood strikes. Feel free to embellish and improvise, as well: "When I grow up, I want to be a riot girl with a big brash attitude," for example, or "When I grow up, I want to be a beautiful playful monster with lots of toys and fascinating friends who constantly amaze me." * Take inventory of the extent that "No" dominates your life. Notice how often you say or think: 1. "That's not right." 2. "I don't like that." 3. "I don't agree with that." 4. "They don't like me." 5. "I'm not very good." 6. "That should be different from what it is." For help in retraining yourself to say "Yes!" at least 51% of the time, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. * SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. * Breathe sweetly and deeply. As you inhale, remember that the calcium in your bones and the iron in your blood were originally created at the core of a red giant star that died billions of years ago. As you exhale, allow your perfect animal body to gentle explode with luminous gratitude. Feel streams of orgiastic compassion flowing out of your wild heart in spiral hallelujahs . . . . Hear the rest of this meditation.
	In one of his diaries, author Franz Kafka made this declaration: "Life's splendor forever lies in wait around each one of us in all of its fullness -- but veiled from view, deep down, invisible, far off. It is there, though, not hostile, not reluctant, not deaf. If you summon it by the right word, by its right name, it will come." I'm bringing this promise to your attention, Aquarius, because you have more power than usual to call forth a command performance of life's hidden splendor. You can coax it to the surface and bid it to spill over into your daily rhythm. For best results, be magnificent as you invoke the magnificence. * How's your fight for freedom going? Are you making progress in liberating yourself from your unconscious obsessions, bad habits, and conditioned responses? For assistance and inspiration, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. * SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. * Help Wanted: We are looking for a benevolent troublemaker of any gender to serve as a model for a statue of the Egyptian goddess of justice, Maat. You must be willing to sit on a lion, wear ostrich feathers, and hold a sword aloft for long hours. Your thighs should be strong and you should be able to make your eyes be wild with the desire to stir up both balance and mercy everywhere you go. Ideally, you are in a phase of your personal life when you are sincerely angry about all forms of injustice, even those that don't directly affect you your own interests. Scrupulous curiosity is also a plus. Hear this meditation.
	I've got a controversial message for you, Pisces. If you're addicted to your problems or if you're convinced that cynicism is a supreme mark of intelligence, what I'll say may be offensive. Nevertheless, it's my duty as your oracle to inform you of the cosmic tendencies, and so I will proceed. For the sake of your mental health and the future of your relationship with love, consider the possibility that the following counsel from French author Andr� Gide is just what you need to hear right now: "Know that joy is rarer, more difficult, and more beautiful than sadness. Once you make this all-important discovery, you must embrace joy as a moral obligation." * Assume that your drive to experience pleasure isn't a barrier to your spiritual growth, but is in fact essential to it. Proceed on the hypothesis that cultivating joy can make you a more ethical and compassionate person. Imagine that feeling good has something important to teach you every day. For inspiration in practicing this approach, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPE. * SACRED ADVERTISEMENT. The oracle below is from my book PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings. * We are waking up. As heaven and earth come together, as the dreamtime and daytime merge, we register the shockingly exhilarating fact that we are in charge -- you and I are in charge -- of creating a brand new world. Not in some distant time or faraway place, but right here and right now. If you do not bring the genius within you, it will destroy you. But if you do bring forth the genius within you, it will free you. As we stand on this brink, as we dance on this verge, we cannot let the ruling fools of the dying world sustain their curses. We have to rise up and fight their insane logic; defy, resist, and prevent their tragic magic; erupt with our sacred rage and supercharge it. But overthrowing the living dead is not enough. Protesting the well-dressed monsters is not enough. We can't afford to be consumed with our anger; can't be obsessed and possessed by their danger. Our mysterious bodies crave delight and fertility. Our ancient imaginations demand fresh tastes of infinity. In the new world we're creating, we need lusty compassion and ecstatic duty, ingenious love and insurrectionary beauty. radical curiosity and reverent pranks, voracious listening and ferocious thanks . . . . Hear or read the rest of this meditation.
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